- Handpainted — every one is unique
- Made in Canada
- Ships within 3 business days
- Packed with care (and probably attitude)
Orders are handpacked and shipped within 3 business days of payment. Concrete Critters are heavy — shipping rates are calculated at checkout based on your location.
Each Critter is inspected before it leaves us. If yours arrives damaged, get in touch at [email protected] within 48 hours with a photo and we'll make it right.
Because every Critter is handmade to order, we don't accept returns for change of mind — but we stand behind our work. Full refund policy
About this Critter
Behold: The Cobra Chicken in its Final Form.
Ever looked at a Canadian Goose and thought, "I wish that raw, unbridled rage was available as a decorative accent?" Your highly specific prayer has been answered.
This isn't just a product; it’s a lifestyle upgrade for the bold. Whether it’s guarding your porch from unsuspecting delivery drivers or simply judging your indoor footwear choices from the bookshelf, this goose brings that authentic "Park Path Stand-off" vibe right into your home.
Why you need this chaotic icon:
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100% Intimidation Factor: Features a gaze so piercing it could convince a transport truck to take a detour.
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Whimsical Lethality: It looks soft, but we all know the truth. It radiates the energy of a creature that has never known the meaning of the word "yield."
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Canadian Heritage: It’s as patriotic as a double-double, but significantly more likely to chase you across a parking lot.
Warning: Product does not actually hiss, but you may find yourself apologizing to it for no reason. It’s a Canadian reflex.
Why a Critter?
It will stare at you from your bookshelf. Lovingly. Judgementally.
When guests ask "where did you get that?" — that's the moment. You'll know.
No two are the same. Yours is already plotting something.

